With all you are - who do you love?

My first blogging entry in 4+ years. Wow. Time gets away.

What was in those 4+ years?

Retrospective personal assessment: I graduated nursing school. I got the first job I applied for in nursing and passed NCLEX first try (miracle of Jesus). I learned to live with the consequences of my choices not without regret. I also learned to live with the consequences of other peoples choices with much tears and sorrow. I got to work with strong amazing women juggling so much and I got to feel what it's like to be part of a true team. I was the victim of two car accidents. I got one tattoo which turned into 8 tattoos. I felt the imminent real fear of becoming an orphan with my mom's first massive heart attack followed a year or so later by her second and then with the daunting diagnosis of heart failure. I moved out onto my own for the first time in my life (long overdue). I made my own home from scratch all by myself. I worked night shift and lost parts of my sanity. I got assaulted by a patient. I learned what good leadership is by unfortunately experiencing the lack of it. I got my BSN while working full time. I applied for and transferred to a different nursing position. I learned that the grass is never completely greener on the other side. I learned to assess and go after what's truly important to me. I worked with amazing, generous surgeons. I applied for and transferred to another new position in nursing. I lost one beloved animal friend and rescued another. I learned that the love of my Gammy is core thing in my life and to make peace with the past.

Question: Where is God in this?

He was right there though a majority of the time I didn't see it or care.

The verse of the day on my desk calendar is Matthew 22:37 "You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and with all your mind." I think that's the heart of the matter. You must love the Lord with all of your efforts, faculties, fancies, and thoughts. When faced with a choice that the secular world is calling "good" - stand it up the test of "who is it loving?"  Who is this action serving? Who does it show I love when I...? Does it show I love God utmost when I...? I think it is a great clarifying litmus test for all of us. With all you are - who do you love?