there is nothing God doesn't see

There are countless articles, sermons, and messages that say God "turned his face" while Jesus was on the cross, that God couldn't or wouldn't look at Jesus hanging there in innocent, sinless, unspeakable agony and suffering. Let's look at a rational for this thinking and reasons why I don't think it's biblically correct.

One justification I read for thinking God "turned his face" stated that God couldn't bear to see such an evil act committed; "God's "eyes are too pure to look on evil” (Habakkuk1:13)." I agree that that the crucifixion of Christ is nothing less than murder, the most evil murder that has ever been or that ever will be committed. A terrible sin. But of course God does look at terrible sin. He is aware of it. He knows all about it. Nothing escapes His knowing at its most basic and intimate level. If the author of the statement above would have read Habakkuk further he would have seen the next verse which says, "why do you idly look at traitors and remain silent when the wicked swallows up the man more righteous than he?" The writer of Habakkuk isn't saying God is too pure to look at evil and therefore doesn't - the writer of Habakkuk is saying God is righteous, pure, and holy and then takes exception to how God who is all those things could bare to look at the wicked sin rampant in the world and not do something about it. It's a outcry to the fundamental problem of man: why does the omniscient all powerful God allow bad things happen to good people?

Did not Abel's blood cry out to God from the earth? (Genesis 4:10). God senses evil at dimensions we don't even understand. He abhors it but He sees it. It enrages, revolts, and sadness Him at levels we don't and probably can't fathom and yet He doesn't become corrupted by His knowing.

Psalm 22 begins with, "God my God! Why have you forsaken me?" which mirror the words of Christ on the cross. I remember something I read years ago, that stated in biblical times when someone would refer to the beginning of a Psalm, it was actually reference to the entire Psalm. Psalm 22 goes on in verse 24 to say, "For he has not despised or scorned the suffering of the afflicted one; he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help." If it can be agreed that Psalm 22 holds certain messianic references then it must also be agreed that the verse shows GOD DID NOT HIDE HIS FACE FROM CHRIST especially at the moment when Christ needed Him most, when Jesus' obedience was at its utmost His Father was looking. Horrified and proud, sad and awed. But looking. He couldn't stop Christ from suffering but He never left him. The price of sin is something innocent must die. Sin is an affront to the glory of God and the penalty is ultimate because His glory is ultimate. 

You may be asking, "Geeze Jenny, why make this such a point?" Because it's very important to remember that there is nothing God doesn't see especially when it appears that one is forsaken and alone. Obedience to God may cause others to abandon, mock, even want to physically hurt you. Think of Stephen who while being stoned to death prayed for those throwing the rocks. Nothing stepped in and stopped Stephen from dying but that doesn't mean that God didn't care or wasn't paying attention. Nothing may step in and stop the hurt you are experiencing in a moment but God is with you in the midst of it - to the end.

God sees every corruptible, despicable, and deceitful act, thought, and word. And yet He is still pure, holy,  righteous - and here is the kicker - willing and mighty to save us. If God could not bare to look upon sin, He would never have saved us, been concerned with us, able to see us. Ezekiel 16 - The Lords Faithless Bride:

And as for your birth, on the day you were born your cord was not cut, nor were you washed with water to cleanse you, nor rubbed with salt, nor wrapped in swaddling cloths. ⁵ No eye pitied you, to do any of these things to you out of compassion for you, but you were cast out on the open field, for you were abhorred, on the day that you were born.⁶ “And when I passed by you and saw you wallowing in your blood, I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ I said to you in your blood, ‘Live!’ ⁷ I made you flourish like a plant of the field. And you grew up and became tall and arrived at full adornment.

We from our first breath we are wallowing in sin and filth and impurity. Psalm 51:5 "Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me." We are born dead spiritually and have no affinity towards the Light because we love darkness and our deeds are evil. We all need not only physical birth but spiritual birth and we can't make it happen. And no amount of "good" deeds or sacrifices we can offer can make us pure and spiritually alive in the eyes of the Father. Jesus - only Jesus - could do that and did do that. "For all who believe He gave the right to be children of God. And that is what we are!" (1 John 3:2) His Father loved Him, was greatly pleased with Him, and watched Him suffer the greatest injustice ever to be the justice that would reconcile us back to Himself. Romans 8:33.

God sees everything at its utmost deepest motivation and layer. May we all tremble before that terrifying beautiful truth and embrace the seen sacrifice of Christ. He see's us to our marrow and runs towards us like the Father of the prodigal son full of forgiveness, compassion, and love. Remember the words of the song "Jesus paid it all." Come home to Him and live for Him. xo

the juxtaposition of life and death

"By faith Abel brought God a better offering than Cain did. By faith he was commended as righteous, when God spoke well of his offerings. And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead." Hebrews 11:4 NIV

"And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead." Isn't that incredible! Able has been dead thousands of years, murdered by his own brother. But his faith is still speaking, still alive. How awesome and humbling that actions of faith remain and live after physical death. Faith must be powerful if it actions speak forever.

Grief, death, and loss are entwined into our lives here on earth. They are as vital on lifes journey as the joy, mercy, and love we experience.

There are different kinds of life and death. There is the physical kind of living and dying for all of us of course. But there is a sort of death when we put away childhood fantasies, games, and toys and enter into maturity with its realties and responsibilities. And there is, according to God, spiritual life and death. According to scripture, someone can have all the earmarks of being alive, they are talking and walking around, breathing and blinking, but they could very well be dead in the most lasting way possible - spiritually.

"The last enemy to be destroyed is death." Jesus triumphed over death physically and He made it possible for those who have faith in Him, and live in Him, to triumph over death spiritually right now, in this plane of existence which is connected to eternity in ways we don't understand. "And by faith Abel still speaks, even though he is dead."

For those with faith in Jesus Christ, death is not the end, it's a doorway into a place beyond imagining, a place where God visibly walks and all things are permeated by His being and light.

If you find yourself grieving today over something seemingly dead, know you aren't alone in your tears. I pray you know how much God loves you. Yes, feel the grief, but through faith, feel the neverending forever love in this existence and beyond it. We will meet again dear friends we have lost. xoxo

living hope - more than words

"our circumstances are temporary,

and our God is enough"

I have said before that I treasure words. As a person who loves reading written words, listening to spoken word, and who enjoys writing and using words as a way to express and encourage others and to personally process feelings and thoughts - words are a bubbling fountain of utmost importance to me. Words are a source of hope.

1 Peter 1:3 states, "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead..." A living hope... what does that mean?

I Googled "living hope" and came across the words of theologian John Piper:

"What is "living hope"? The New Testament idea of hope is very different from our normal thinking about hope. We say to someone: Will the MN Wild win the Stanley Cup? And they say: I don't know; I hope so. In other words, hope, as we typically think about it, is a desire for some future thing which we are uncertain of attaining. That is not the way Peter, or the rest of the New Testament, thinks about hope. When Peter says in 1:13, "Hope fully in the grace that is coming to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ," he does not mean we should desire it and be uncertain of it. The coming of Christ is a matter of complete confidence for all the writers in the New Testament. So the command, "Hope fully," means be intensely desirous and fully confident that Jesus Christ is coming again with grace for his people..."

"Peter calls it "a living hope." What does that mean? The opposite of a "living hope" would be a "dead hope," and that calls to mind a similar phrase in James 2, namely, "dead faith." "Faith without works is dead" (2:26), James says. That is, faith is barren, fruitless, unproductive (2:20). So "living faith" and, by analogy, "living hope" would be fertile, fruitful, productive hope. Living hope is hope that has power and produces changes in life. This is what "living' means in Hebrews 4:12, where it says, "The word of God is living and effective." So Christian hope is a strong confidence in God which has power to produce changes in how we live."

Piper goes on to say, "Words by themselves don't produce hope. There has to be some assurance that they are true."

Whatever you are facing in your day today, calamity or creativity, calm or chaos - please think about the living hope you have in Christ. It's not a dead, pie-in-the-sky, I hope the Cubs get some decent pitching or the object of my affection responds to my text messages kinda hope; We have a living hope to help us in whatever situation, mood, or mentality we find ourselves in today. xo

The Power of Hope

like a lily among thorns

Today is February 14, 2019. A day that is set apart to celebrate romantic love... and to sell flowers, candy, cards, and crap. Very little is untainted by the hand of consumerism but I digress.

A day especially set apart for lovers is for a single woman really no different than any other day. Society has gotten perhaps slightly better about entertaining the notion that singleness isn't equivalent to leprosy, but only slightly. When the only romantic love in your life is what you have with a pint of Haagen-Dazs after a 12 hour shift, February 14 doesn't really feel like it's living up to its hype.

I was listening to NPR on the way home yesterday and they were discussing a big thing now isn't Valentine's Day but Galentine's Day which is on February 13. It's become such a widely celebrated thing that Hallmark has a Galentine's cards section and some restaurants offer Galentine's "couple" dinner specials. I get why, it's so women can stop feeling bad about the Valentines Day "holiday" by celebrating fellow female friends. Galentine's is a celebration of friendship among woman and who doesn't like that idea (said a woman). Valentine's Day for someone without a valentine can shine a spotlight on an area that some woman already wrestle with - singleness.

I don't believe that singleness and not being in a romantic relationship for a woman equals being unworthy/flawed/unacceptable/or unattractive. Not at all. Though we have come a long way as a society in accepting that not being attached/engaged/or married doesn't make one less valuable or whole, sometimes singleness is still treated like being the bottom member of some horrible ancient caste system - bring on the tattered clothes, poor hygiene, and mutant features, a single woman in her 30s or dare I say it 40s approaches (cue Twilight Zone music). This is especially more true I feel in certain Christian communities.

Seriously, to get up on a tiny soapbox for a second, how many people do you know that are in a relationship seem like they are satisfied with their relationship? I can think of two maybe three of my friends that are truly in a functional healthy happy relationship but way more that for varying reasons aren't. I am not saying that when one is in a relationship that should be their only source of satisfaction - God forbid. Eww and codependent much. But what is the point of being in a relationship - whether it's dating/engaged/married - if you aren't with each other on a day to day, good and bad, shallow and deep, authentic tear-joy-filled "my eyes are open and I adore this person" level. Being in a relationship doesn't mean, pardon my French, but jack shit. Being in a relationship where both parties are filled with deep passionate humble love, patience, and affection for each other - now that is something to admire and aspire. Our lives and our love is not about hearts and flowers one day a year; its about trust, peace, and presence all 365 day a year. Life in love is life with sharing and intimacy and laundry and disagreements and discussions and laughter and games and plans and messes...

I was looking at the Song of Solomon this morning, a lot of beautiful racy sentiments if you care to gander. But this is where I paused especially with the harsh long winter we are having:

My beloved spoke, and said to me:
“Rise up, my love, my fair one,
And come away.
For lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone.

The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of singing has come...

There are many beautiful quirky sentiments shared in the Song of Solomon. He says of her, "Like a lily among thorns, So is my love among all other women" She says of him "My beloved is mine, and I am his."

On a day consumed with consumer symbols of "romantic love" don't forget what great love really looks like and means. Rejoice over it whether you have it or not because it's beautiful. xo

words are forever

I have been thinking about words the last couple days. As someone who enjoys reading and likes writing, words are to me what paints and clay are to an artist. Words can be such a comfort and offer joy to those between whom they are shared; words can be humorous or clever, fiery or calming.

But words for all their good, beauty, and versatility can also be used in devastating ways. Words said to us or about us that were cruel, vicious, unfair, maligning, disappointing - those words remain long after they've been spoken. On the other side, kind uplifting things said to us can be recalled to but often requires more effort to remember at least for me. Are you ever haunted by words said to you long ago? I can't imagine anyone saying no. Words are in very real sense forever. Proverbs 18:21 says, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits." Whether written, spoken, and thought about - words have enormous importance.

John starts his gospel about Jesus this way... "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it."

It's amazing, incomprehensible even, to think of Jesus Christ not just as someone who communicated with words but who is the first and last, beginning and end Word.

"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom..." Colossians 3:17

The Word of Christ can live and reside inside you.

"And you became followers of us and of the Lord, having received the word in much affliction, with joy of the Holy Spirit..." 1 Thessalonians 1:6
The Word of Christ can be received or rejected, welcomed with joy or discarded with disdain.

"For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming the Lord will by no means precede those who are asleep." 1 Thessalonians 4:15

The Word of Christ gives authority to the things we say to each other.

"The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever." 1 Peter 1:25

The Word of Christ stands forever, it will never expire, tire, or fall.

What words are you using today? xo

Matthew 13 - The Parable of the Sower

need is necessary

"We are not going to learn how to grab hold of true and divine joy when our circumstances are good - it's going to be when we have nothing other than God to cling to with both hands."

Question: Do things have to be rock bottom dire before one can say "Jesus is all that matters; Jesus is all I need"? Do you think that it's true that one has to hit rock bottom before they can truly embrace Christ as their treasure? Without knowledge of their need, can or would anyone come to Christ?

I think need is necessary. You can't live out Jesus being all you need unless you come to appreciate, value, and treasure that Jesus is all you have and you can't do that unless you have been stretched beyond your human limits. Suffering, grief, pain - these are catalysts that bring us to our metaphorical and actually knees.

Take the story of the prodigal son. "But when he had spent all, there arose a severe famine in that land, and he began to be in want" (Luke 15:14). The prodigal son was just that, a squanderer, wastefully extravagant with his time, money, relationships, and soul. His being in "want" was the foundation of his awakening that lead Him to go home to his Father. He spent all he had and was at the end of himself.

Need is necessary for new birth.

I have semicolon tattoo on my left wrist which I have had several years now. If you don't know, the semicolon has come to be a symbol for mental health awareness and suicide prevention. The premise is that instead of a period which would end a sentence, a semicolon continues the story on; we are all the authors of our own lives and we chose the semicolon over the period - we chose to go on despite the pain, the difficulties, the struggles because our story isn't over yet.

I got the tattoo after going through a period of devastating loss, sadness, turmoil, and rejection. On multiple fronts my life was just dark horizons. At least that is how I saw it at the time. My rock bottom pit of darkness, shame, and sadness. Jesus is the Light that reached out and pulled me out of the drowning dark waves. How can you know that Jesus is all you need? Because He literally is all we have.

And who is He? He is kind, merciful, good, honest, sincere, righteous, light is who He is, The Way, The Truth, The Life, pure, holy, sinless, perfect, worthy, helpful, faithful, honoring, obedient, a leader by example, unique, the singular son, wise, omniscient, constant, present, near, The Alpha, The Omega, The Beginning, The End, eternal, internal, flesh, Spirit, Man, God. Need Him? There is nothing without Him. xo