Spoil Me

When you ponder how you want your life to look like now and in the future, it isn't wrong that you think to yourself, "I want to be able to spoil (or a.k.a. bless) my children and my grandchildren."

That's a good thing to want.

But be able to spoil and bless them how? With stuff? With trinkets and toys? With trips and adventures? With a sharing of hobbies? How do you want and what do you want to spoil them with? What would it look like? What is the end result?

I would say, humbly, that the biggest spoils in my life were never toys or trinkets. I was spoiled/blessed most when I was given shared time, shared trust, and shared truth. Those are what were valuable and long-lasting and meaningful and "spoiled" me - those things blessed me then in the moment and the memory of them continues to bless me now, though many years have gone by. Words of Gods truth and knowledge of Him and kindness bubbling forth like from a spring - are worth more than a 1000 video games and 100 trips to Disney. It was the connection that has lasted not the confections.

Spoil your children and grandchildren with the greatest thing you can spoil anyone with - by glorifying God in what you say, and do, and eat, and drink, and watch, and read - in all you do. (1 Corinthians 10:31) Let them see that your spoiling of them springs from your joy and zeal in God. Be so filled with the goodness of God you must share it with others. Remember: Happiness is only real when shared, be happy in God. xo

not a consolation prize

Sometimes I will get 5 ideas for a post within a couple days. Other times, I can go months without anything inspiring me to write even a post-it note not to mention a paragraph. The title of this post is "not a consolation prize" based on an idea I had several months ago. It's been in draft form long enough.

I think that for all of us, there exists two potential authors of our life story.

Author one is ourselves. In this story we call the shots. Everything is perceived through how it helps us achieve our own self oriented goals. We are at the center. We are the most important character and those who help us achieve our desires are given a secondary character role.

Author two is God. When God writes our story he dictates each moment. Everything is perceived in how it glorifies Him. The goal is God and at the center is Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who was crucified on a cross, resurrected on the third day, ascended back to heaven, and now intercedes for us at the right hand of God.

There is a self authored portion of my story that has many chapters of me treating Jesus like a consolation prize. You see, and maybe you can even relate, I couldn't get what I really wanted with God so I consoled myself with thoughts of God. I wanted a dad in my life, a big functional family, a normal upbringing, freedom to live away from home, a healthy relationship, etc. If it's true "where your treasure is there your heart will be also" then my treasure was not Jesus only. Jesus was the consolation prize for not getting what I really wanted.

My internal dialogue went something like this, "No fiery hell for eternity - that's nice, that's really nice. That's amazing. But what about my list of my wants for this life, for the now? These aren't even bad wants; why won't He give them to me? If nothing is impossible for Him and He dictates each drop or rain and calls forth every star that's made - why are thing the way they are? Why was so much of my story sad? Maybe there is a shortcut to getting a better life. Other people seem to make it and they don't follow any of the things in the Bible. Over and over, I hear the pastor saying "following Him is the best way to live," but obviously they say that, they have everything already, family, friends, home, marriage, wealth, prestige, good easy jobs. Wallow in the muck here with me and say that."

So I walked away. God's authorship just wasn't appealing anymore. A consolation prize is nice but it's not essential.

But Jesus isn't a consolation prize and he isn't content to merely be that for anyone.

Honestly I was the author of my story most of the time. Gammy had taken me to church since I was a kid. I had heard the bible preached and I was baptized like Christians are supposed to be. I tried to go to church and get connected with other Christians. I wasn't looking for one night stands or hanging out in bars stumbling my way home every night. I wasn't escaping my life with drugs and sex. I went to a job I hated everyday like I was supposed to. I tried to "do the right things" but I was doing them for the wrong reasons. It was as if by doing the right things I felt I was owed a certain kind of result. I wasn't doing the hard work of finding out if the things I was doing were right because God said so or because I was told so by someone else thats what I should be doing. I was kept afraid and shelters, caged like a bird. Morals, convictions, and duties aren't essential if they're imposed and not owned. 

Question: When does one realize that Jesus is all they need?
Answer: When Jesus is all they have.

The road to rock bottom is different for everyone. The prodigals story is all our stories. Thank God he doesn't always give us what we want but he gives us what we need. Now I understand what Paul was saying in Philippians.

"But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ  and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death,  and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead." Philippians 3:7-11

"For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified." 1 Corinthians 2:2

"We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin." Romans 6:6

Is Jesus The Prize to you or merely a consolation? xo

exult before him

"Sing to God, sing praises to his name; lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts; his name is the Lord; exult before him! Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation. God settles the solitary in a home..." Psalm 68:4-6

Do you ever feel like your life is one big desert? You hoped for rain to fall but the dark storm clouds brought lightning and thunder but not a drop of water. You hoped for some warming sunshine but instead got scorching heat and burning rays. You thought the oasis was ahead but it was just a cruel mirage. You need to hear what Psalm 68 says - "Lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts; his name is the Lord." The Lord doesn't take a detour around the desert; he travels right through it.

Do you ever feel like your unclaimed, unloved, or forgotten? You hoped your relationship with your dad had turned a corner for good but instead things just got worse. You hoped you had found some stability and security only to have been betrayed and abandoned.  You thought that you had found someone to share love and life with but they rejected you and left you to once again to find your own way. You need to hear what Psalm 68 says - " Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation. God settles the solitary in a home."

Have you ever heard of a God like the one of the Bible? What other God cares about fatherless bastards and vulnerable widows. There is no one like Him. He deserves, He is worthy of the most praise.

Romans 8:32 says, "He (God) who did not spare his own Son (Jesus) but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things!" He has never, not for one second, forgotten you. Don't forget Him. xo

the babe leapt in her womb

"Now Mary arose in those days and went into the hill country with haste, to a city of Judah, and entered the house of Zacharias and greeted Elizabeth. And it happened, when Elizabeth heard the greeting of Mary, that the babe leaped in her womb; and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit." Luke 1:39:41

In utero John was capable of rejoicing in the Lord. Wow! How amazing, wonderful, and glorious that reality is! How sobering too.

"A person's a person, no matter how small." -Dr. Seuss

friend, father, and kinsman redeemer

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened." Matthew 7:7-8

John Piper wrote the following about the above passage of scripture:

Three times he invites us to pray — or, you could say, if you will hear it lovingly, three times he commands us to pray — to ask him for what we need. It’s the number of times that he invites us that gets our attention... The repetition is meant to say, “I mean this.” I want you to do this. Ask your Father for what you need. Seek your Father for the help you need. Knock on the door of your Father’s house so he will open and give you what you need. Ask, seek, knock. I invite you three times because I really want you to enjoy your Father’s help."

There is something about asking for what I need that I resist and struggle with. There are a couple reasons for this I think.

1. Being fatherless myself, the concept of asking a dad for something is lost on me. I have seen others close to me who have fathers in their lives but so many of those relationships are poor models of limitless trust and abounding love. Sadly it's too often the opposite. A dad's love is only theoretical to me; it has not been part of my earthly experience. The love Jesus describes as having with his Father blows my mind because Jesus says we through Him we can share in their love (John 17).
2. Beyond fathers, I think it's hard for me to ask for what I need because it would be admitting I need something. That might sound dumb at first reading, but upon some reflection, I think I have tried very hard to not be dependent on anyone which is impractical and isolating at best and prideful and haughty at it's worst. If I don't need anything from anyone else I can't be disappointed; I don't have to risk their rejection or feel the pain if they fail. Also, if I don't need anything from anyone, I have no obligation to "repay" their help because I never asked for it begin with. 

In its best light you could read that and say "She is very independent" but I myself know there is more fear and sorrow in what is written there than there is strength. No one is born independent. We all relied completely and needed someone else for everything from the most beginning moments of our lives. Independence, in all its forms, is learned.

Vulnerability. Dependence. Surrender. These words are not sweet to the flesh but they are to the Spirit.

Ask expecting to receive.
Seek knowing you will find.
Knock assured the door will be opened.

A few months ago I pleaded with tears one dark night and begged God to be my friend, my Father, and my kinsman redeemer. Each of these things is significant, and each of us needs these things, and God is all these things and more to those who ask, seek, and knock.

Friend - John 15:15 "No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you."
Father - 1 John 3:1 "See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him."
Matthew 7:11 "If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him!"
Kinsman redeemer - Revelation 21:4-6 "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.” And he who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” Also he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” And he said to me, “It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment."

Ask, seek, and knock on the door knowing your friend, Father, and kinsman redeemer will answer and has answered before you asked! xo

What is truth? Ask THE TRUTH.

"I wish you'd never told me. If I didn't know, I'd be happy right now."

- Game of Thrones, Season 8, Episode 4

 

Can you relate to that statement? Can you relate to the mentality behind it? "Don't tell me the truth; it will ruin my happiness." "Don't tell me the truth; it's too inconvenient! It will change things! It will force me to have to choose and I don't want that responsibility!"
 

The saying "Ignorance is bliss" exists for a reason. We can't be upset about what we don't know. We can't be held responsible or more importantly culpable for the things we do if we don't know they're wrong. But once we know the truth - things are never the same again. We might be able to ignore the truth, suppress our knowledge of it, but we can never really forget the truth once it's known. The truth changes everything.

A Francis Chan message I listened to recently demonstrated this very point. He talked about how since he was a kid he has liked eating salami. He has no idea how it is made and he said he didn't want to know for fear that knowing the truth would ruin his ability to enjoy eating it anymore. It's a simple example that is very relatable to many areas of life. How often we just don't want to know the truth!

Sometimes the truth just hurts. I am sure you can think of time in your own life where the truth brought devastation but here are few scenarios that are playing out right  now somewhere for someone in which the revelation of the truth isn't a blessing but a seeming curse:

• You think your teen son is at a safe supervised party but they are really in a dangerous situation with drugs, drinking, and difficult choices they're not yet strong enough to resist.
• You think your family member is looking out for you only to learn the truth that they have stolen your identity to perpetuate financial fraud.
• You think your partner is working overtime every week only to learn the truth that they are meeting someone else for an affair.

"So you are a king?” Jesus answered, “You say that I am a king. For this purpose I was born and for this purpose I have come into the world—to bear witness to the truth. Everyone who is of the truth listens to my voice.”  Pilate said to him, “What is truth?” (John 18:37-38)

"What is truth?" This is a very philosophical existential looking question and without the context of Jesus the Son of God it can seem like an abyss in which to flounder and drown.

But Jesus didn't say he was bearing witness to a truth but to the truth. Long before this trial Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you had known me, you would have known my Father also. From now on you do know him and have seen him.” (John 14:6-7)

"So what?" you might ask. What does this talk of the truth mean for us now? It means the originator and definer of truth isn't science or history or man - it's always been Jesus. Today in whatever your doing and in all you do - seek the truth, listen to the truth, and let the truth live through you. Hold all your thoughts, words, and actions up to the truth and see if meets His standard. Through Him we know truth. 

Link: What is truth? 

a daughter of Abraham

"Now he was teaching in one of the synagogues on the Sabbath. And behold, there was a woman who had had a disabling spirit for eighteen years. She was bent over and could not fully straighten herself. When Jesus saw her, he called her over and said to her, “Woman, you are freed from your disability.” And he laid his hands on her, and immediately she was made straight, and she glorified God. But the ruler of the synagogue, indignant because Jesus had healed on the Sabbath, said to the people, “There are six days in which work ought to be done. Come on those days and be healed, and not on the Sabbath day.” Then the Lord answered him, “You hypocrites! Does not each of you on the Sabbath untie his ox or his donkey from the manger and lead it away to water it? And ought not this woman, a daughter of Abraham whom Satan bound for eighteen years, be loosed from this bond on the Sabbath day?” As he said these things, all his adversaries were put to shame, and all the people rejoiced at all the glorious things that were done by him." Luke 13:10-17

Observations regarding the passage:
1) The synagogue ruler didn't care that a fellow congregate was suffering. Not only did this woman suffer physically from a chronic condition but her condition most likely made her a social outcast as well  leading to another dimension to her suffering. That Jesus removed her suffering meant nothing to the supposed rule "law" followers because they were so desensitized to the suffering of others. "Let her be healed some other day" that's the speech of someone extremely calloused to the suffering of other people. If you were suffering would you want to wait for another day to be healed? Today is the day, that's Jesus' way.

2) When I first read this section of scripture I was greatly disturbed for it says "Satan had kept her bound for 18 years" but if we think through what we know of God's sovereignty and omniscience, it was God who allowed Satan to bind her all that time. God may not have caused her suffering but He allowed it and allowed it to go on for almost 20 years. I was deeply troubled for some time.
But then I read it again and the words "She glorified God" popped out at me. It might be that she wouldn't be a daughter of Abraham if she hadn't suffered this affliction. If it came to the choice of a straight spine during life on earth but with no thoughts of God or a crooked back for 20+ years leading to trust in God and an eternity in the bosom of Abraham, I hope we know what we'd rather have.

3) She went to the synagogue on the Sabbath. It doesn't say of this was her regular practice or if she was drawn to the synagogue just this once because she had heard Jesus was there. But she went. It's a great lesson about not putting off attendance at church or resisting the command to gather with fellow believers. We need others and they need us.

Prayer: God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob - who is God our Father - I am a Daughter of Abraham because of the finished work of your Son Jesus. I share in the eternal inheritance you have promised all your children. If it comes to a choice between my will and my dreams with an eternity apart from you OR trust in your will, filled with temporary sufferings and personal costs, with an eternity as your daughter - I ask you to help me make the righteous and wise choice. Give us spiritual eyes that look beyond this temporary fading world. Let us gather together and relieve the suffering of those around us today. Amen.